Hallelujah

What I’m Wearing

Hair – [Bade] –  Luca – Browns

Hoodie – .twenty13. – King Q Hoodie

Jeans – [KD] – Tyler Mesh Saggy Jeans W/HUD ( Dark Blue)

Shoes – FLite. – Masters – Snow

Ok, I want to start out by saying to Marz and Brae, I love love LOVE the hoodie you made for me. King Q Hoodie is awesome and everyone should have one. So many options on the hud and it’s awesome quality as always. Ok….onto my story. Sorry if this is too personal for anyone, but I always feel better after I write things down.

Saturday afternoon my life changed completely and it happened in an instant. I think we all take things for granted a little bit too much, and it makes me sad to think an incident like what happened to me and my family Saturday to really realize what we have and what we should be cherishing.

I was with my girl and our children at the waterpark on Saturday and my stepson wanted to go deeper in the wave pool. He didn’t want to wear his life jacket so I told him if he would put on his life jacket, I would take him a little deeper. He put on his life jacket and we moved a little bit further into the wave pool.

I noticed him drifting just a little bit and knowing he’s not a great swimmer yet, I moved forward and grabbed him. When I had him in my hand, I turned around to push him back to the part of the pool that’s more shallow. I shouldn’t have turned my back because the waves then came over top of my head and pulled me under.

When it pulled me under I had a really difficult time bringing myself back up, and once I did another wave came and pulled me back. I was grabbing at the rope above me trying to bring myself back up to get some air, the third time I came up I didn’t have a chance to get a breath and ended up inhaling water instead. I don’t know if anyone has ever experienced that before but its probably the scariest feeling I’ve ever had.

I was trying to save myself, but somewhere in my mind I kept thinking it’s gonna be ok, there are life guards everywhere and someone will save me. Unfortunately, I looked up and saw the life guard, just staring at me like he didn’t know what to do. As soon as I saw him, I heard the most heartbreaking sound ever. I heard my 13 year old daughter screaming for me over and over in the most desperate scream I’ve ever heard from her, the fear in her voice, killed me, in between that I could hear my girl screaming for help. That’s the moment it hit me, if I didn’t save myself, I was going to die. I’ve never had that moment of mortality hit me before then, that moment when you know, this might be it.

I won’t kiss Tif again, I won’t hug my little girl again. I won’t be there when she needs me. I won’t be there when her and my step kids have pivotal moments in their lives. I won’t be there to brush a tear off their cheeks when someone hurts them. I won’t be there to hold Tif’s hand when she needs me.

That moment woke up a strength in me that I didn’t know I had. I kicked and I grabbed at the rope and I pulled myself up the side of the pool with every ounce of strength I had. I don’t know how I did it, but somehow I got out. I coughed up a lot of water and sat down and looked at tif and our kids and I just lost it.

At the end of the day, I got a broken foot and some bumps and bruises, but I’m still breathing. And that’s what matters. So please, take a moment to remember those who love you and those who need you. Let them know how you feel. Don’t let petty bullshit ruin things that should be cherished. Until my next blog, peace, love and always buy .twenty13. !!!

Click here for what the lovely Tif is wearing !!!